Tina is a successful executive at a pharmaceutical company in New England. Over the past two years, as she rose in the ranks to become a vice-president, Tina also developed a troubling reputation. Her co-workers saw her as someone who was fiercely competitive, not willing to share credit, and quick to shoot down any proposal that she didn't generate herself.

Tina felt powerless - recognizing this disturbing aspect of herself but seemingly unable to curtail it. In our consulting sessions, we used the Living the Questions technique to discover what was motivating this behavior.

It turned out that Tina came from a particularly unloving home in which the children got approval only for being super-achievers. She came to feel, unconsciously, that if she wasn't the staff member getting the most credit, then as a result she was hopelessly unworthy.

Once this pattern became clear, Tina was then able to accept the part of her that felt so unworthy, and that had, due to her previous resistance, been running the show. With simple, effective instructions, Tina was able to create within herself the sense of worthiness that had been lacking. Rather than using the band-aid of 'self-esteem,' she went to the heart of the problem and solved it.

Now, a few months later, Tina's employees have all noticed the shift. She's easier to work with, and more productive as well. And most important, Tina sees her team not as a battlefield, but as an opportunity for mutual support and success.